Not knowing a condition that a patient mentions – Talking to doctors – Friends doing massage courses and me suspecting they might give better treatments than me  – Meeting craniosacral therapists – Bumping into ex–patients and their Mums at toddler group, especially ones that never came back – Being asked how does this work? – Skeptical Dads and grandmas at a baby’s first appointment – Getting a message to ring a patient 24 hours after their first treatment – Treating other osteopaths – Letters from the GOsC – The first few hours of an osteopathy course – Patients going on about how brilliant their previous osteopath was, who evidently did a completely different style of treatment from me – Patients who just want to be cracked  – When you just can’t get it to crack – Meeting patients in the street in a bleary, unkempt state when you’ve just popped out to get the Sunday paper – Male patients who seem to like me a bit too much – Patients wanting to meet up socially – Knowing a patient needs a lot of treatment but not sure if they can afford it – Asking men to take their trousers off – Female patients removing bras even though I tell them they don’t have to “It’s OK, I don’t mind”,  Well I do! – Patients not getting better – Patients who have got so much better on one occasion that they expect me to work a miracle every time – Patients expressing distasteful opinions and having to sort-of-not-disagree with them – Patients who expect you to share whatever whacky beliefs they have, because they think you’re “alternative” – Patients asking me personal questions  – Patients moaning about their partners, who are also my patient – Other osteopaths watching me do treatments – Making a naff referral – Patients with health anxieties who keep asking you to confirm that they definitely don’t have cancer, till even you start thinking they might – Patients who blame you for not getting them better, even though you’re busting a gut trying and they are taking no responsibility for their own health – Find out that one of your patients has switched to a colleague for treatment – Realizing after the treatment that you should have done a different technique for that patient – Patients who just seem a bit strange  – Patients who don’t talk at all – Patients who won’t stop talking – Patients who say a bone’s gone out and needs putting back in – Being asked to palpate specific structures on courses-  Asking for money at the end of the treatment – Trying to book impatient people in when the computer is on a go slow – Booking errors, especially two patients turning up at once Finding that patients have been booked into my breaks – Too many patients – Not enough patients – Being told to chill out Being told I worry too much – I KNOW THAT